[00:00:00] Pam Uzzell: Do you believe art can change the world? So do I! On this show, we meet artists whose work is doing just that. Welcome to Art Heals All Wounds. I'm your host, Pam Uzzell.
At the beginning of this show, I always ask if you believe that art can change the world. Today I'm asking, do you believe that music can heal? I do. I know I do [00:01:00] when I listen to the music of today's artist. I'm so glad you're joining Art Heals All Wounds on this special season dedicated to belonging. Do you have a story about ways that creative work has helped you to belong?
It might be your favorite song. It might be a theater experience. How has art helped you find a sense of belonging? I want to share your story on the show. Now you can go to my website, arthealsallwoundspodcast.com, and leave me a voicemail telling me your own story. I want to get enough of these stories to share on future episodes.[00:02:00]
Do you believe you can belong in two places at the same time? I think many people might experience what the singer- songwriter Lalin St. Juste does. She grew up in L. A., but feels the pull of her Haitian heritage and a need to connect with her ancestors. Lalin St. Juste has been a staple in the SF Bay Area music scene for a decade, with her genre bending band, The Seshen.
In 2021, Laline officially launched her solo career with the release of her debut EP entitled Behind My Eyes.[00:03:00]
With her music, Lalin is celebrating and reclaiming both her matrilineal bloodline and her Haitian heritage. Connecting to a place that made her grandmother and her mother, who in turn made her. And by reconnecting to Haiti, she's also reaffirming her sense of belonging here as a Haitian American.
Lalin sat in her backyard while we talked on a beautiful late summer day here in Oakland. You can hear the crows as they chatter along in the background. I thought about removing them from the track, but if you've been in Oakland, you know the sounds of these birds very well. I hear them all day long in my own backyard.
I left the crows in, because hearing them makes me feel like I belong.[00:04:00]
Hi, Lalin! Thank you so much for being on Art Heals All Wounds. Can you start by telling us who you are and what you do?
[00:04:09] Lalin St. Juste: Yes. So, my name is Lalin St. Juste. I am a singer, songwriter, producer, and sonic alchemist, as I like to call it.
[00:04:24] Pam Uzzell: That makes total sense considering the way that your music sounds. And I think I'm probably the opposite of a lot of your fans.
You've been a long time member of The Seshen and I actually discovered The Seshen by first finding your solo music.
[00:04:42] Lalin St. Juste: Oh, wow.
[00:04:43] Pam Uzzell: Yeah. And so I do want to talk to you about that solo music. It is so beautiful and mesmerizing. I really have often listened to it on repeat many, many days. When I was downloading it, I read what you wrote about it.[00:05:00]
Tell me if I'm pronouncing this right. Vertulie?
[00:05:03] Lalin St. Juste: Mm hmm.
[00:05:04] Pam Uzzell: And you said it's named after your maternal grandmother. And it's an homage to your maternal bloodline and to your Haitian heritage. You said this is the beginning of a reclamation process, a healing journey, and a spiritual discovery around who you are and continue to become as a Haitian American.
And I'm doing this whole series on belonging. And I just thought, wow, I have a lot of questions based on just this statement. So can you just tell me a little bit about your journey to becoming a musician. I read that you were really quiet. You said somewhere that you were really quiet as a child, so I'd love to know how you got started in music and that journey.
[00:05:49] Lalin St. Juste: Yeah, I
was a very shy child and quiet and I found music to be that place that I could really [00:06:00] express myself. Part of why I have such a strong connection to my maternal grandmother is because she was around for the first six years of my life. We slept in the same bed. She took care of me when my mom was working.
My mom was working a lot and she passed away. And when she passed, I was so sad. And so I started to sing and I sang to her. And so finding my voice in that way allowed me to discover that there's this way that I can heal and there's this way that I can be in the world. That's my own kind of way and that's through music.
[00:06:42] Pam Uzzell: I'd love for you to go into more detail about your solo music. I have listened to music from The Seshen and it's wonderful, but it's very different, from what you do as a solo artist. So talk about your solo music. First of all, why did you feel like you needed to create solo music and then what is it [00:07:00] allowing you to express?
[00:07:03] Lalin St. Juste: Yeah, it's, it's really the root of me because that's where I started was with guitar, and I started music playing in cafes and busking with my guitar. There's that side of me that I have to still hold on to that, that softer side, that also songwriter producer side, you know, The Seshen is a very particular sound and it's a very particular thing, but for me,
I have to also produce my solo work so that I can express the totality of me and, and this is a big part of it, this type of music and lyricism and meaning.
[00:07:56] Pam Uzzell: Can you define or talk about what the [00:08:00] style of The Seshen is and then what your style of your solo work is? They're both wonderful, but your solo work is really very different and it is
very mesmerizing, a really different sound. So can you talk about what those two different sounds are and then really go into your style?
[00:08:18] Lalin St. Juste: Yeah. The session is a electronic genre bending sound, you know, that has been influenced by bands like Little Dragon. And I would say that's a very big influence that you can hear in our sound.
And so that brings dance and production, very sleek production and things like that. And my sound is more homegrown. And also I do tap in a bit, maybe more into an experimental space and incorporating, at least with Vertulie, I'm [00:09:00] incorporating some traditional Haitian music in, in the song called Psalms 91.
It ends with traditional drums. There's guitar, it's a bit more intimate. However, my solo work is probably going to keep evolving and changing, but it will still have that aesthetic of this somewhat ethereal and cosmic and spiritual aspect to it, because that's just a part of who I am. And a part of my music is doing this work to connect to my spirituality, to connect to my lineage, to connect, you know, so that's that's always going to be a thread in some way or another, but you know, I still may make a dance track, but, but as of now, it's really meditative and really introspective.
[00:09:53] Pam Uzzell: Yes. And I was going to say, it's really music you could put in your headphones and just daydream for a while. I would [00:10:00] love for you to go into more detail about both your Haitian heritage and your spirituality that you are reconnecting to with this music. Are they interlinked? I'm assuming they are, but I'd
love to know more about it.
[00:10:15] Lalin St. Juste: Yeah, they are. I am the daughter of two Haitian immigrants. They came to the U. S. in the late 1970s. And I I grew up in L. A., so I was a little bit outside of the community. And as I got older, I learned more and more about my Haitian heritage, and I fell more and more in love with it. I think it still took a lot of time because, you know, just a mixture of identity.
Being Black and, and being in America and identifying as Black American, but then also very much Haitian American and the food that I ate and, and the stories I would hear growing up. And so a part [00:11:00] of my practice is to keep learning about who I am in that way, because the way things have been set up, it has been set up so that I don't learn about who I am.
And I feel that also in my family, the way that colonization and racism and all of that has impacted us has been to, at least in cer for certain members to separate from what has been traditional or cultural. For me, my healing is in knowing that it's okay to be who I am. You know, my, my mom, for example, is very religious and doesn't want to talk about Vodou or
Feels that it's really evil. And I grew up hearing that, but then learning that Vodou was used in the Haitian revolution to incite the revolution and that it's [00:12:00] really a spiritual practice around the earth and using herbs and this reverence for, um, these supernatural things that are around us, you know, I had to learn that myself.
And so my spiritual practice is informed by that, by this lineage, by the fact that there are people who practice this in my lineage. And it looks differently with me, but my goal is to understand it and learn about it as an act of decolonization.
And my music is a way to honor my ancestors. It's a way to, to get to, to lean in to these parts of myself. And so that's why in Psalms 91, I start with my mom reciting from heart one of her favorite
Psalms.
[00:12:59] Pam Uzzell: And that's from [00:13:00] your Virtulie EP.
[00:13:01] Lalin St. Juste: Yes. It starts the EP. The psalms is it's, it has multiple uses, but for her, you know, it's, it's her Christianity.
And then it leads into Haitian Vodou singing and drumming, which she didn't like, but that's my healing work is to bridge these worlds and to see that they're really actually quite similar also, but to allow myself to understand and to stand in those worlds.
[00:13:37] Pam Uzzell: I love that you're doing that because I think there's such a misperception, I mean of course in American English we would call it voodoo, there's such a misperception of what it is based on movies and probably a good deal of racism and the legacy of colonialism.
It's really interesting that [00:14:00] you're reclaiming this in a way that is closer to a truth for you than what the perception of it might be for other people who are outside of that
culture.
[00:14:11] Lalin St. Juste: Exactly. Yeah,
there are a lot of misconceptions about Haiti in general. I mean anything you hear about Haiti is usually not positive.
If you hear any news, it's about the violence and kidnapping or you hear about voodoo and zombies and So, yeah, I feel like it's important for me to unlearn all those things inside of myself and also to share those things with others. I do what I do publicly so that it can have some kind of impact. And so for me, I do want people to, to see and hear about different aspects of Haitian identity.
And [00:15:00] also, it's potent for me because I love this bloodline, this lineage so much. And so it's been just this big healing process for me to relearn the language. I have a song on the EP that's in Creole, it's very short, but even doing something like that is big for me.
It's talking about how I... I don't know Haiti physically necessarily, but I feel it when I sing because I started to sing traditional Haitian music over 10 years ago and all this emotion would come over me. So that's what I'm talking about in this song is that the spirits come to me like this feeling comes to me when I, when I sing and that's my connection to Haiti.
Because I didn't grow up there. And so, that, [00:16:00] that's what closes Virtulie is, it's called Ayiti and it's my little ode to this place that I know in my dreams. I know in my spirit.
[00:16:14] Pam Uzzell: I was
wondering, have you had a chance to go to Haiti, or this is just your reclamation through your music and through your parents and your grandmother?
[00:16:25] Lalin St. Juste: I, I have been a couple of times and it was amazing both times and I was supposed to go right around when the president was assassinated a couple of years ago. But I am creating a path to get back to the land and where my mom is from is generally a pretty chill area. You can fly directly there and so I'm creating a path to.
I go to where my mom is from, that's also where the nation [00:17:00] started, and I'm working on the language here. I do Haitian music, and then also in my own solo work, I'm infusing it. And so it's a journey, it's a process, and all of these things are part of it. It's all this reclamation of who I am and who my family was.
It takes time, and it takes really fighting for it.
[00:17:26] Pam Uzzell: Do you imagine yourself performing at some point in Haiti?
[00:17:32] Lalin St. Juste: I do. I do. At this moment I was singing on a rooftop out there with a friend rehearsing for something and I, I see so much. And, yeah, it's all in my dreams right now but I know it's going to be in reality.
And so I've been also spending a lot of time in Brooklyn and creating Haitian community out there and just worked on a project around language. I made some music and a [00:18:00] visual, uh, poem around what it means to speak Creole or not speak. And so, yeah, so much of my work right now is around this reclamation.
It's very, very important to me. It's important for all of us to understand our history and who we are and why we're here and yeah.
[00:18:25] Pam Uzzell: That's such a great point. You know, again, keeping at this theme of belonging, it's really clear the connection that you want to make with your Haitian roots and even that place.
But I'm wondering, does it change for you also even how you are here as a Haitian American and feeling a greater sense of belonging here? I'm wondering if there's any kind of overlap of just that, the healing and reclamation that you're doing just affects you, every place, everywhere.
[00:18:55] Lalin St. Juste: Oh
yeah, yeah, I mean, since this is my primary [00:19:00] place, you know, I, I feel it.
It's a dance for me, in terms of my sense of belonging, I know that I belong in a lot of places and also no place at the same time. I go to Haiti, I am seen as an American. And then here, there is this conflict obviously with America, you know, I'm Black. And yet at the same time, this is my home. And so...
There's a conflict with where I belong, there's a, a non belonging, and then also, also me figuring out, well, you know, it's a new sense of belonging. It's creating a new, kind of like third culture, it's create your own thing.
[00:19:50] Pam Uzzell: It's a really interesting challenge, but by the same token, it creates such amazing creative work.
And it really [00:20:00] seems like it's an opportunity to, again, define what it means for you to belong.
[00:20:07] Lalin St. Juste singing: It is. It is. I think that's what we're all doing. And I feel like I have a unique perspective pulling from here and there and creating a new sense of home. You know, I was thinking about this recently as I am trying to figure out my place in the Caribbean and, say, performing in places and all these things and...
You know, I'm also queer and it's creating this whole, whole other world because the world that we currently live in, it can't necessarily hold all of who we are. And so I do enjoy this eclectic blend that I'm creating with me and my community and we're all [00:21:00] figuring out together.
[00:21:03] Pam Uzzell: I love that. So there's one song I do want to ask you about specifically called, I Believe in Things.
I think that's the first one I heard and I was like, Oh my gosh, this is an amazing song. So can you talk about
that song?
[00:21:18] Lalin St. Juste: Absolutely. I think that was the first song that I wrote from the EP. I had just gotten back from Jamaica, and I've been connecting a little bit with Jamaica in substitution for Haiti a little bit.
It has been easier to go there. My partner's half Jamaican, and so I had just gotten back. But being there, the first Caribbean island I went to was Haiti, and it, of course, it reminded me of Haiti, and it reminded me of the place that my people have been for hundreds and hundreds of years, living off the land and I was fresh off of that [00:22:00] Caribbean essence, you know, and thinking about my family and thinking about the lives that they lived.
And that song just came, those first few words, I believe in things I cannot see, only feel, and I felt something recently that I can only sing. And that just came to me because that's literally just how I felt, you know. I feel like I'm in this it's a world full of invisible surprises, messages, all these things from my ancestors, from the unknown.
And so I think part of being Haitian and hearing my mom talk about people shapeshifting, just really magical things. It's like, this is the world that I'm in. So I believe in things I cannot see. [00:23:00] And, and it's also. It's a homage to my ancestors for providing the way, for providing these messages, for providing this intuition.
It's me saying that I know that they're here, and I feel them, and I can acknowledge them, and that everything has led up. Everything that has come before has led up to this moment now, so I honor that. So that song means a lot to me. I love to sing it.
[00:23:28] Pam Uzzell: It's beautiful.
It's such an amazing song. Speaking of your mom, you gave your mom a kidney.
[00:23:34] Lalin St. Juste: I did!
[00:23:36] Pam Uzzell: That's amazing. It's so wonderful. And how are you and your mom both doing after that?
[00:23:42] Lalin St. Juste: We're doing really well. We just had our six month anniversary, or kidneyversary. It's been a very emotional thing, especially in doing all this matrilineal music, one of the songs I was listing out my [00:24:00] all of her relatives, all of my relatives, those are people on her line.
And so then to, then give her a kidney. There were just so many layers to it. And so I'm just really grateful that I got to experience that and am experiencing that. And I highly recommend it. If there's someone in need. It's a major surgery, but it's a really beautiful thing to share. Especially with my mom, because it's my mom.
You know, she gave me life and she worked so hard. So
[00:24:33] Pam Uzzell: it's a really beautiful story. Really, really touching.
[00:24:38] Lalin St. Juste: Thank you.
[00:24:39] Pam Uzzell: Lalin, can you tell people where they can find out more about you and find your music?
[00:24:45] Lalin St. Juste: Yes, absolutely. So you can find me anywhere that you listen to music. Lalin St. Juste. La l a l i n s t j u s t e. And if you are [00:25:00] in the Bay
Area. Yeah, stay in touch. I have some performances coming up in the Bay. Also in Brooklyn. I'm on Instagram and all the social media so everyone can stay in touch, uh, on Instagram at laline underscore music.
[00:25:16] Pam Uzzell: Okay,
well, you've performed twice recently that I know of and I've been out of town both times so I am really keeping my fingers crossed that the next time you perform I will be in the audience.
[00:25:30] Lalin St. Juste: Ooh, those, those were, yeah, those were good ones.
[00:25:35] Pam Uzzell: I
know, I've read about them. I've read about them, so I am, I'm hoping that the next time I will be there, but I really want to thank you for being on the podcast and sharing your journey of reclamation and healing that helps you feel like you belong in all these different spaces where it can be challenging.
Thank you so
much.
[00:25:58] Lalin St. Juste: Thank you. Thank you [00:26:00] for having me and wanting to know more. I really think this podcast is great, so thank you.
[00:26:24] Lalin St. Juste singing: Every time I turn around, I feel a feeling something's brewing, but I can't pin it down and there's no reason. All I know it's something big and loud. It's a new vision and it. It's getting even clearer now with every season. With the wind inside my hair, I let myself float on air. I'm not sure what's out there, but I know I'm not done here.
With the wind inside my [00:27:00] hair, I let myself float on air. I'm not sure what's out there. But I know I'm not done here. I
just know I'm ready now for all the changes. Pour some honey on it, rain it down. I got my graces, I am standing on their shoulders now. I see their faces and I know that I will make it out.
[00:27:54] Pam Uzzell: You're listening to Art Heals All Wounds.[00:28:00]
I'm so grateful to Lalin St. Juste for sharing the story behind her solo work and how it makes her feel like she belongs. I'll put links in the show notes to where you can connect with her, and I'll also include a link to her work on Bandcamp. If you're listening to this before October 12th, 2023, and you're in the Bay Area, Lalin St. Juste will be performing at the California Academy of Sciences that night.
If you miss that show, just keep following her for upcoming announcements of her performances. Don't forget to leave me a voicemail, sharing your story of belonging on my website, Art Heals All Wounds [00:29:00] podcast. com. I want to share your stories on future episodes. If you want to support this podcast, you can also buy me a cup of coffee at my website.
Any little bit helps me to continue making this show.
The music you heard in this podcast is by Ketsa and Lobo Loco. Two of Lalin St. Juste's songs were featured. I Believe In Things and Wild Winds from her latest EP, Vertulie. As always, this show was recorded using Squadcast FM.
Art Heals All Wounds comes to you from Oakland, California, on unceded territory of the Chochenyo Ohlone people.[00:30:00]